*starts fog machine*

THOUSANDS OF YEARS AGO...

Name: ライム

Age: Old enough to know better

Gender: Masculinely female-esque

Sexual Orientation: Left

Location: Surfing on the lake of fire, rocking out and hi5'ing Satan every time I pass him on the shore

Species: Robot

Favorite color: Homo

Favorite food: The flesh of the unborn

Sign:

Size: Bigger than the moon

Ninjas vs. Pirates: Ninjas. Unless we're discussing global warming, in which case, pirates.

Danger Level: DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

Favorite Bowel Movement: That one that was pitch black and smelled like charcoal. It was like someone had a BBQ in my ass.

Favorite Method of Abusing HyperKinetic: Throat punchery and groin kickery

Favorite cat macro: JESUS CHRIST IT'S A LION GET IN THE CAR

Favorite bad movie: That one with the dude who does that thing.

In 5 words or less, explain why ninjas are so awesome: FRISBEE SEPPUKU

If your right leg was Thanksgiving, and your left leg was Christmas, could I meet you between the holidays?  No.

Puppies + ice cream = FLAMETHROWERS

Before you’re born the FSM is handing out fetishes. Pick two: Nice hands. And a willingness to crossdress for my amusement.

Midgets, ninjas, pirates, robots, or monkeys? WHEN OUR POWERS COMBINE...

オハ!ライムと申しけど、お前はちゃんと「さん」くれる。俺の仕事は赤ちゃんのパンチをする。メチャ楽しい仕事。いつ俺はひまがある、赤ちゃんを食べるし、ドメスチックバイーオレンスをするし、お祖母ちゃんをぶっ飛ばす。俺は、海賊王になる！