There’s a lot I could write about myself (Me, me, me, me, I LOVE ME.) but really you only need to know a couple of things. I like to horrify myself and others watching hilariously bad porn on the internet. Also, I love dick and fart jokes.

Ninjapornian Member Survey

Name: Fraggle. Also known as Frags or Fargle. Or possibly Argle Fargle. And sometimes Argle Fargle Gargles (I don't).

Age: Crotchedy Old Man. Pull up your pants and get off my lawn.

Gender: Generally androgynous

Orientation: Northeast

Location: Florida's taint

Species: Muppet

Sign: Neon

Size: D

Danger Level: BLACK WATCH PLAID

Favorite color: Glitter

Favorite food: Indian

Favorite Bowel Movement: Dancing hamsters

Favorite Method of Abusing HyperKinetic: Cannibalism

Favorite bad movie: Snakes on a Plane

Do you like beans: Refried

Would you like to eat beans with George Wendt: Only if Gas-X is present

Write a short haiku on the topic of animal husbandry:

If it weren't for my

Horse, I never would have spent

That year in college.

Puppies + ice cream = Bob Dole

Midgets, ninjas, pirates, robots, or monkeys? Minja Robot Monkey Pirates.

Favorite cause of death? Auto-erotic defenestration

What do you want to be when you grow up? A typewriter. The machine.

If your right leg was Thanksgiving, and your left leg was Christmas, could I meet you between the holidays?  That depends. Is pie involved?

Favorite quote: I have several, but I'll just tack on a few.

Obscenity is whatever gives a judge an erection.

Originally I was the helmsman of the USS Enterprise. In Star Trek VI, I was promoted to the captain of the USS Excelsior. But each and every night I get to be admiral of my bathtub.

- George Takei

I wasn't questioning your authority Archchancellor, I just feel that if a huge monster evolves into a chicken right in front of you, the considered response should not be to eat the chicken. -Pratchett, The Last Continent

In the beginning, there was nothing, which exploded. - Pratchett

I have some weird compulsion where I like to go around the internet and update my various profiles every few months or so. Hell, I just like fiddling with things I have access to on the internet. I don't know why, but I do it. My profile and likely images and such on the wiki will change every once in awhile.

I can be found in various places on the internet, but under different names. Fraggle was my original name online and it's the only one I'd go by in real life, but alas, it's hard to grab on forums. I can also be found on LJ as ornerybitch and on some gaming fourms (mostly Half-Life >_o) as GrowlypantsMcGee.